Disclaimer: i don’t fucken know how i initially wrote this post to ramble on about turning 20 and how it really sucks to how the fuck i’m such a boring whore, but really, i’m fucken bummed out about turning 20 years old this year! And I want you as a reader to realize that being 20 years old should be the age of “hibernation” so you can have the energy to go fucken ballsitic when you turn 21, and also as a reader, i want you to realize that this bitchass blogger here is a fucken adult that has a goal of being a damn nerd. TRUTH.

So the other day, i thought about how old i’m getting. I’m about to turn in my teenager-badge and trade it in for the 20s this year. As you can imagine, i’m not very excited at all. Turning to the big 2-0 is kind of ridiculous because the age of 20 is just at a standstill; nothing really exciting except i’m fucken older. I would say 19 can be typified as a standstill-age, where nothing exciting happens; however, keep in mind that 19 is the last teenage age. But 20, well that just sucks. Obviously, when you turn 21, that shit is just going to be a pure age of drunkard moments. According to my sisters, it’s hard to remember what happened when they were 21 because they were just drunk. 

I think i’ll experience the 20s differently from my sisters to be honest. I do want to spend my 21st birthday obviously in vegas, yet i have to keep in mind my priorities. When push comes to shove, i’m willing to push aside my birthday for school. I’m imagining people are giving me this dirty look right now like, “WTF YOU BORING WHORE.” Yes, i may be a boring whore, but this boring whore has priorities. 

See, let me try to clarify why i’ve turned into the biggest boring whore. You know, i stopped craving to drink or doing any illegal activities when the majority of my friends moved away from college, and i’m stuck here in a community college. Don’t get me wrong: i’ve never been more proud of my friends and boyfriend for going to great colleges they deserve to go to. Frankly, they inspire me to be better.

Nowadays though, i’ve been so focused upon studying and getting A’s in school; i’ve become the biggest nerd ever; i have no shame in my game. It’s hard to explain to my friends that i need to get A’s because i want to transfer somewhere that is amazing because eventually they think i’m an asshole for implying they’re stupid somehow if they got B’s or whatever. That’s not the case at all! It’s just different. My friends can afford to get B’s and not straight A’s since they’re at their college away from home, living their life and having the best of time. As long as they’re not failing, i don’t think they are extremely obligated to get all A’s. But for me and anyone else who goes to community colleges that yearn to transfer to a great university, we don’t have the chance, time, and money to not get the best grades we can earn from a class.

This is my second chance of redemption to prove to people that i’m not stupid and have the capability of becoming successful. Yes, i am selfish for thinking about myself compared to thinking of myself with my friends, but what can you do? Obviously, i would want to spend time with my friends and make memories with them, but time has changed. Really, i’ve probably changed because of my priorities. I’m really at a time of my life, where i feel more of an adult that wants to go to school. I don’t even want to take any breaks whatsoever. You can ask deven about how bum i was when winter break came. I just want to steer the ship forward and take my units so i can transfer soon.

If i did go to college right after graduating from high school, i’d probably be transferring right now; that’s the sucky thing about my situation. Truthfully, i try not think like that because it really weighs down my spirit and i don’t need that shit in my way. I want to tell myself to keep believing things happen for some sort of reason that is unexplainable. When i didn’t get into any college i wanted to get into, i felt my world was just shitting on me, but now, i finally can see that my fate was to go to community college, so i can get my priorities straight and become an adult. I’ve learned to not complain so much about “why is this happening to me” to “okay this shit does fucken suck and i’ll complain about the suckiness of it, but for now, i’m going to say ‘fuck off’ so i can concentrate.” Fuck the damn obstacles and shit that people go through. But not really, because if there wasn’t any hardship in our lives, there would be no bloggers on the web to complain about craziness. 

Well, that’s that for the boring whore’s perspective. Sayonara you beautiful reader who took the time to read this shit. You’re an amazing, thoughtful human being.